Damaged...

Today started out okay. I woke up around 7:30 and read for thirty minutes and then started the getting ready for work routine. Shower, shave, read the news, and sometimes blog. I wouldn't say I was in a happy mood but I wasn't sad either. It was just blah. 

As the day dragged on, my mood went up and down. At times I was strong and confident about my future. And at times I was sad, confused, and pessimistic. Jealous pretty much finds its way into my thoughts on a daily basis but I'm learning to let it flow and move on. 

I really want a second job so I can rid myself of debt. My sister messaged me this morning saying I should move close to her and I came to the realization that I HAVE to work full time because of the debt I've accrued over the past 4 years. I hate that and am really going to try to change it. Tomorrow after work I'm going to every restaurant in town and putting an application in. I don't care what I do as long as it's a night shift. 

The happy, confident periods in between the down ones are starting to grow so I have hope that I will get better.